Friday, June 3, 2011

Flipped off by a bridge troll, Neo american retail FAIL, Sears sucks

Completely off topic:  So  yesterday Jimmy and I went on the hunt  for  a pepper mill.   And experienced our usual   neo american retail fail.  Started at Sears because Jimmy thinks its funny now; to walk in, ask for an item, be told "no we don't have that"  and then walk out empty handed.  But forward, During our pepper mill death march I was  stopped  in the lane waiting for traffic to pass so I could cross over the parking lot to P 1 imports (also  a fail).  One of the cars I was waiting to pass by,  turned on its signal to turn down the lane I was stopped in.   The guy must have thought I was hogging the road  (even though he had plenty of room to turn in)  because as he drove past me he  honked his horn to get my attention and then flipped me off.  Normally this kind of behavior would ruin my day.   But this guy was a bridge troll..... I swear.....  An honest to god.. bridge troll.   He was very  stout and hunched over. His head was the same height as the steering  wheel and enormous.  His car was ancient and rusty. Nothing on him was NOT wrinkled.   He lifted an enormous fist and then flipped me the bird  with the fattest, stubbiest finger I have ever seen.  All the time growling and  gnashing his teeth at me.  He was being as angry and intimidating as he could  be  and all I could do was.... laugh.  I mean...... I was just flipped off by  a grimms fairy tale character!  Instead of ruining my day, it turned the whole pepper mill quest  into a surreal adventure that included  angry bridge trolls.
Too many mushrooms in College? Maybe.  But I think the moral of the story is..... If you look and act  like something from  'Three Billy Goats Gruff', NO ONE is going to take you  seriously.... so, be nice.

1 comment:

  1. You got 'shrooms in college?? Am jealous! Never saw or tried a single shroom the whole time I was there, just tolerated my peers when they were high on them.

    Wow, you saw your very own troll! That's awesome. Poor fella.

    What sort of fancy-pants pepper mill are you looking for, anyway? Because...(shh) I may be able to get you one. I have a connection. ;)